Date Ideas for Every Day of the Month

We need to spend some time as a couple and as a family. This time must be quality over quantity. This time is so important that if you have to reserve it in your agenda, do so. Your family bonds will grow stronger. Here are some suggestions of dates you can have both as a couple and as a family as well. Starting with family activities can be frustrating sometimes because the family is not used to reserve time for them, and most of the time they have their own preference in activities such as video games, hanging out with friends, watching tv, etc.


Don’t give up.  Instead, start planning ahead the activities you want to have. If you plan ahead of time the rest of the family will have time to plan activities for themselves. You don’t need to have an activity as a family every night, but you do need to spend some time as a couple reserved for nothing else. If you have kids, there is a chance that you might be interrupted, and that is okay. But before you fall asleep, talk to your partner and reserve all your attention for him or her.

The following suggestions can be done as a family or as a couple.
1.      Go for a dip in a public pool (probably not the best idea for a first date)

2.     Go to a local aquarium, aviary, zoo, etc.

3.      Take a walk in the park.

4.      Go to the grocery store and get an ice-cream cone.

5.      Go for a drive in the mountains.

6.      Stay home and watch a movie.

7.      Go for a date with the whole family

8.      Go to a local mall and people-watch

9.      Have a game night with the whole family

10.  Go to a museum

11.  Go to a movie.

12.  Go to a play

13.  Have a water balloon fight.

14.  Plan scavenger hunts together; either compete with your partner or make it a group date and invite some friends.

15.  Plan a service date. Help at a food bank, homeless shelter, orphanage, or at senior home, animal shelter, etc.

16.  Go bowling.

17.  Go to an arcade and play

18.  Play laser tag

19.  Have a night of star gazing

20.  Go paint balling

21.  Go camping. If not overnight, just to a bonfire

22.  Have a family-film night (watch your home-made movies)

23.  Go window shopping at a mall, and have a meal at the food court.

24.  Have a barbecue

25.  Cook a meal as a family

Here are some activities that are more weather-related, but always fun!

26.  Go swimming

27.  Go for a picnic

28.  Go for a hike

29.  Go ice blocking (buy ice blocks from a store, and slide down a hill on a park).

30.  Go to an amusement park.

31.  Build a snowman

32.  Carve a pumpkin


 Here are some activities exclusively for couples.

33.  Keep a journal or a blog together as a couple with memorable things for posterity

34.  Go to Starbucks and have a drink and a good conversation

35.  Turn the tv off and have a fun conversation about fun memories or something not too serious.

36.  Watch a game at a sports bar

37.  Go to McDonald's and order random food, put blindfolds on and feed each other. See if you can
      guess correctly what you are eating. It is super fun and you get to eat at the same time.

38.  Go to a thrift store and find random stuff.  Be sure to try wigs and funny outfits.

39.  At the thrift store that you went to one day before, pick an outfit for your partner and wear it on a public date.

40.  Make a special dinner at home. If you have children, have them stay at grandma's, a neighbor’s or at a classmate’s house.

41.  Go to a comedy club

42.  Go to a local concert.

43.  Reserve a night for ROMANCE.

Be patient and plan ahead. If your partner is usually tired because of their work schedule, don’t be frustrated. Have some simple relaxing time. No matter how tired your partner is, there is always time for some steamy activities, but if your partner is not feeling well, do not pressure, just be there and show him or her how much you love them.

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A Manual to a Woman's Heart

The following tips are things that I have learned during my marriage and and dating life. Although none of them are guarantees for your wife/girlfriend, they are usually fairly constant across all the women that I have dated, and my wife.

1. Most women hate it when guys say perverted things.

2. Women like to be told that they're beautiful, rather than hot, pretty, cute, or sexy. It just gives more meaning.

3. Women love to feel special, even though they might not show it.

4. Most women talk about EVERYTHING with their girlfriends. So don't do anything that you wouldn't want her girlfriends knowing. If you treat her good they'll know and love you for it, if you treat her bad... may heaven have mercy on your soul.

5. When a woman is upset and says, “Don’t talk to me right now”, she really wants you to come hold her and comfort her.

6. Tell the woman you care about that she is pretty and that you love her every chance you get.

7. NEVER criticize a woman’s food, no matter how nasty. (Just eat it and shut up)

8. Remember sense of humor, WOMEN LOVE GUYS WHO CAN MAKE THEM LAUGH.

9. Women hate guys with poor hygiene, however a guy who takes longer to get ready than his wife/girlfriend is a huge turn off too.

10. Women love guys who know how to dance.

11. Women love it when a guy pulls them close by the waist.

12. Women go crazy when a guy smells good.

13. Women hate cocky guys.

14. Usually, when a woman is sarcastically mean to you, it means they're attracted to you but are afraid that they'll be showing too much (on the other hand, if she is sarcastically mean to you she may just think you're an idiot... The trick is trying to figure out which one it is).

15. A kiss on the hand with the right timing can be a REAL TURN-ON.

16. When a guy says something really sentimental, women will remember it forever.

17. The smallest gestures, the smallest stares, and the smallest statements could make a woman's year. No joke.

18. Women get embarrassed easily, even if guys don't know what the hell just happened.

19. When a woman is upset and wants you to listen, she wants you to listen. Don't give her advice unless she asks for it.

20. When a woman is crying, she feels a lot safer if you pull her close and tell her that everything is going to be alright.

21. Women love it when guys say their name.

22. Women don't like short-tempered guys.

23. Sometimes women just wish that guys would notice when they get a new haircut or if they're wearing eyeliner.

24. Women find it a lot more romantic if you just fall asleep holding them in your arms rather than having a night of hot, kinky sex.

25. Most women are nervous to say "I love you" first. But that doesn't mean she doesn't want to scream it from the top of her lungs. (Most guys are the same way)

26. Women love confidence.

27. There comes a time when women have needs too. Enough said.

28. A woman will cry over you a lot more than you think.

29. A woman’s emotional wounds can last awhile. And when I say awhile, I mean forever.

30. When a woman cooks for you, you know you mean a lot to her.

31. Eyeliner is a girl's essential product. Don't ever try to take it away from her.

32. Women hate it, absolutely HATE IT, when guys don't keep their promises. It throws them over the top.

33. A phone call, a text message, or a single Hershey's kiss will mean A LOT MORE than a bouquet of flowers and a box of chocolates on her birthday if you can’t afford it.

34. Every woman has at least one feature that they feel fairly confident about. They just have a hard time admitting it.

35. Women are VERY SELF-CONSCIOUS when it comes to their looks. No makeup is a very sensitive topic.

36. NEVER check out another woman if you're in a committed relationship, ESPECIALLY in front of her.

37. Remember, for a woman, sex is almost ALWAYS more than just sex.

38. Women need to be “warmed up” before sex. (no just plow and go for your own pleasure.[SEE PICTURE & QUOTE BELOW])

39. EVERY woman wants to be treated like a goddess. Make her feel as beautiful, sensual, and as important as the goddess that she really is.

40. Wham bam thank you mam (aka the typical quickie) is nice every now and then, but the key to a good relationship is to focus on her rather than your raging second head.







"A woman is like a diesel engine, it might take a while to warm up, but once she's warm....... she can go for a long LONG time." Jeff Foxworthy


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50 Ways to Romance Your Wife

50 Ways to Romance Your Wife

1. Make sure your kisses last at least six seconds. Every now and then, go for a full minute.

2. Feed each other grapes.

3. Stick a love note in a lunch box, purse or pocket.

4. Send funny and/or romantic cards by snail mail or e-mail.

5. Learn how to give a great foot massage.

6. Wash each other’s hair. Watch the movie Out of Africa for pointers.

7. Set your alarm for five minutes earlier than usual to cuddle.

8. Smile at each other.

9. Get silly with each other and laugh out loud together.

10. Grab your partner for a spontaneous dance when a favorite song comes on the radio or stereo.

11. Make eye contact when you talk.

12. Hold hands.

13. Leave a wonderful voice mail message on their phone.

14. Text a love note.

15. Send a love e-mail every day.

16. Leave little love notes in unexpected places.

17. Send a funny photo on your phone.

18. Ask about each others’ days.

19. Listen with 100% attention.

20. Give a one-minute shoulder massage.

21. Do something unexpected for your spouse.

22. Snuggle on the couch.

23. Touch each other with affection.

24. Notice and comment about something your spouse does that you like.

25. Say thank you.

26. Say you’re welcome.

27. Be interested in what your spouse is doing.

28. Tell a joke.

29. Leave a flower.

30. Offer to help.

31. Write a poem.

32. Read a poem to your spouse.

33. Cook a romantic dinner.

34. Offer to cook dinner if you aren’t the one who usually cooks.

35. Burn a CD with favorite songs, or love songs.

36. Post photos on the refrigerator or bathroom mirror that remind you of wonderful times you’ve shared.

37. Bring home great take-out for just the two of you.

38. Say “I love you” in a different way every day.

39. Slow dance to a love song.

40. Write a love note on the bathroom mirror. PG-rated if you have kids!

41. Offer to take the kids out of the house for awhile and give the other parent some alone time.

42. Dip a strawberry into whipped cream and feed to your partner.

43. At night, step outside together for five minutes and look at the stars.

44. Sing to each other.

45. Make a care package with his/her favorite snacks and leave it in the car.

46. Establish a weekly ritual that you faithfully observe. For example, watching a favorite television program, taking a walk after dinner, putting candles on the table.

47. Give your spouse a little token to wear as a reminder of your love. (Try for creative rather than expensive.)

48. Kiss your spouse on the back of the neck.

49. Flirt with each other.

50. Watch a sunrise or sunset together.


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Building and Maintaining Trust in a Relationship

Trust in your relationship is the most valuable thing you will ever have. Once the trust is gone, the marriage is soon to follow. Below are some tips that I found online that I hope can help you build, maintain, or strengthen the trust you and your spouse share. I can personally attest to these being the key to a strong relationship. My wife and I share everything, and our relationship is stronger than those of most of our friends.

• Keep what your partner tells you within the confines of your relationship. Telling others what your partner has shared with you in confidence destroys trust.
• Don’t rely on email, phone calls and texts to communicate with your partner. Spend time communicating face-to-face. Communicating in person will help each of you to build a greater sense of security as you become more open and vulnerable with one another.
• Consider your partner’s interests. The more you do for him or her, the more he or she will know that they can count on you and that you have their best interests at heart. If your partner feels like they can count on you, it will make it much easier for them to share the more vulnerable parts of themselves with you.
• Follow through with the little promises that you make. For example, if you say that you will call or be some place at a certain time, be sure that you do these things. Small actions matter toward helping you to build a strong foundation of trust.
• Learn to apologize when you make a mistake or disappoint your partner. An authentic apology should be sincere and from the heart. To be truly meaningful, take responsibility for your actions and reassure your partner that you understand how your action impacted him or her.
• As you learn more about your partner, allow yourself to share more personal information and history with him or her. Aim for balance between how much each of you shares, since trust is not built if only one person shares.
• Spend time together doing things that make each of you happy. Since you are two different people, you will naturally like some different things. Being open to a new experience that your partner brings to you will build the bond between you and trust will follow.
• Practice forgiveness when you are upset with your partner, and let go of a hurt after the two of you have talked it through. Receiving a sincere apology builds trust in an important way.
• Take some time away from your partner to check in with yourself, and get some feedback from your trusted friends or relatives. By taking space and speaking with a trusted friend or relative, you may gain a new perspective about your relationship. For example, you may discover that you have been pushing aside information about your partner that tells you this person cannot be trusted. On the other hand, you may discover that your partner is ultimately worthy of your trust.
• Trust can fluctuate over time as each of you experiences the bumps of life. Reassure each other that your love and safety are still intact. This will further strengthen the foundation of trust between the two of you.

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Healthy Relationships

"A healthy relationship is based on equality and respect, not power and control. Think about how you want to be treated and how you treat others."  I go back to the golden rule, be to your partner as you would like your partner to be with you.

Here are some little tips:

1. "Honesty and Responsibility: Not making excuses for your actions" Some of which may include:

- "Admitting when you are wrong". Sometimes it's hard to do. But it is also relieving to remember you are only human.

- "Keeping your word". Your partner needs to know he or she can count on you; after all, if there is no trust in a relationship, there is nothing.

- "Not canceling plans".  Sometimes we plan ahead what we are going to do. It's a total heartbreak when one of the parties cancels that special time to go do something else. It also can diminish trust,  and feelings like being neglected, let down, and ditched can take place.

2. "Open Communication: It is being able to express your own feelings or opinions". As individuals, we all have our own opinions about everything. As a couple, we might share some of those opinions, but chances are we also disagree in some things.

- "Knowing it is OK to disagree". It is self explanatory, but always keep in mind that your partner has his or her own brain, comes from a different background, and was raised differently. Also, you and your partner might have different experiences that might change the point of view. Remember that marriage is about two individuals working together in the same direction.

- "Saying what you mean and mean what you say". As we always say, your partner is not a mind reader, and neither are you. A little help goes a long way when it comes to expressing what is happening. Remember that communication is the key to success in marriage (besides love, of course).

3. "Appropriate Intimacy: Respect boundaries" 

4. "Physical affection" Physical contact is one of the languages of love. Not everyone likes to be touched and kissed all the time, but it is important that you talk to your partner and find a happy point where you both feel comfortable. Some people do not feel comfortable displaying their love and affection in public, while some actually enjoy it.

- "Holding hands"

- "Hugging"

- "Respecting when your partner says no" (Again you can read the blog mentioned above)

- "Paying attention to body language" This one is a very good one and I need to point out to the ladies that men are sometimes a little oblivious about body language. Sometimes it is better to talk it out. Nevertheless, if you try to hold your partner's hand and he or she softly tries to let go, it is a pretty strong hint there. Now, since we are actually talking about marriages, I hope you feel comfortable enough to talk if something is bothering you.

5. "Fairness and negotiation" Just remember that in order for this principle to work, there has to be communication. Be gentle at all times. When you are going to tell your partner something that is bothering you, use the sandwich principle. I will describe this principle later. Some valid points about fairness and negotiation are:

- "Accepting change"

- "Being willing to compromise"

- "Working to find solutions"

- "Agreeing to disagree is OK"

The sandwich principle works like this:

*Say something nice about him or her.

*Be honest but gentle at saying what is bothering you.

*Say something nice again.

Here is a golden piece of advice: DO NOT EVER START A SENTENCE WITH THE WORD "YOU".

For example: "You make me so mad when you leave your dirty clothes in the floor. I've been cleaning the whole freaking day!"

Notice how the above sentence accuses the person, which in response will create defenses instead of an open mind that is ready for communication. Instead, always start with the word "I" and follow with an emotion. For example:

"I feel so frustrated and tired when I find your clothes on the floor. Would you please help me with that?"

Notice how the sentence has changed from being accusatory to being a mere expression. Nobody can argue with your feelings. On the contrary, they will be open for communication. Also, notice how at the end of the sentence you are in fact committing the other person to fix the problem. This model can be used in every case. Remember that if you accuse someone of something, that person will create defenses. After the defense has been placed, communication will be blocked and impossible at that moment, since he or she is no longer listening.

6. "Shared responsibilities: Making decisions together"  Like we said before, marriage is a  partnership. What one does will affect the other. This principle is especially important when kids are around. Remember that your partner is only human, and can do only so much. Same thing for you, I know you are amazing, but you are also human. Go ahead and give each other a loving pat on the back! Great results come from hard work, love, and communication.

7. "Respect": Here they describe some events in which it is important to validate your partner.

- "Pay attention to your partner even when your friends are around."

- "Valuing your partner's opinion even if it differs from yours."

- "Listen to what your partner has to say before you formulate what you are going to say."

- "Acknowledgement of what you receive from your partner."

Remember always that your partner has feelings, so be gentle. Insults and harsh words will only lead to a bad self-esteem, fear, and a hurt heart. Again the golden rule: Treat your partner as you would like to be treated yourself.

8. "Trust and Support: Being supportive." Sometimes our partner might come up with a great idea (or at least it is a great idea according to himself or herself). DO NOT EVER put him or her down. You are his or her #1 pal and he or she needs your support. If such idea is absolutely lunatic (aka Peter Griffin from Family Guy and his shenanigans), be honest but be gentle at doing so. Never say that he or she is not good enough for that, nor use any words that would have the same meaning. Sometimes we just want to share an idea, and all we want is to be heard. So let's LISTEN to what our partner has to say and let's show our love and support. Even with a loving smile, a pat in the back, or a gentle kiss. If we are not there to support him or her, you can bet there is someone out there who is willing to.

People who cheat on their spouse usually don't start doing it for sexual reasons.  Emotional reasons and emotional emptiness are the main reason why people cheat. Sometimes those reasons are because he or she might feel:

-Neglected

-Disrespected

-Feels the lack of support from his or her partner.

-Lack of communication

-Ignored

-Sexually frustrated, emotional emptiness in the bedroom

-Lack of commitment

-Lack of interest by partner.

-Feels that he or she is not understood by partner.

By no means are we excusing such behavior. But instead we want to point at those red flags and those behaviors that can be easily fixed.

May your relationship be healthy in every way! This is our goal. Remember that it is never too late to change for the better and to improve yourself and your marriage. Communication is the key!


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Remember to Play

Early in relationships, it's easy to be playful. At least, it is for most people. I had a first date once where we were going to a movie of my date’s choice. The movie she chose was “Happy Feet,” and we went into a mostly empty theater. We decided to sit in the very last row and things were going great. Well…. about halfway through the movie, she got bored and pulled out a book and a small book light. “What are you doing?” I asked her. “I am bored, so I am going to catch up on my reading.” I was stunned…. We were watching a movie (which if I had my choice we would have been sitting in “Tenacious-D and the Pick of Destiny” or “Casino Royale”).  I don’t think it is such a huge jump to make the conclusion that this was not only our first but also our last date.

I suspect that most people do a better job being playful on dates, but once you're coupled up and having regular discussions about who did the dishes last, play may not come as easily. I'm not giving up, though. In his book Play, psychiatrist Stewart Brown says that playing is key to keeping relationships from hardening into drudgery. The downside is that he doesn’t give any ideas or suggestions to how couples should do that. So, here are a few ideas we have done (or want to do):

Challenge your partner to a wrestling match. Careful to not be too aggressive, and also watch out for fingernails and jewelry.

Play people-watching "Bingo." All you need for this one is a pen and paper. The next time you're bored and are at the local mall or run out of things to talk about at dinner, draw a grid and fill it in with people you're likely to see. In our community, for instance, that might include "two or more women with yoga mats," and "Couple who are clearly using pets as practice children". Then trade grids and play Bingo for a good prize, like a backrub, the other person paying the bill, or something a little more sensual.

Play the "Newlywed" game. I actually had a good time playing this with my parents and a handful of friends not long ago. The trick is vetting questions so that they are spicy but not too revealing. So, "Where was the first time you did the dirty?" – this might not be so good for a family game. But "Where was your first kiss?" works well.

Impromptu Pillow Fight.  Ambush your partner with an impromptu pillow fight! Nothing can keep the passion alive in a relationship more than maintaining a sense of humor! (Trust me, NOTHING is funnier than watching your partner fly across the bed in their underwear, pillow in hand, yelling “BONZAI” as the pillow is swinging at your head.)

Play Photo Booth. Grab your camera phone and start taking pictures of you two. Make funny faces, kissy faces, and capturing a sweet kiss between the two of you! BONUS: Add your favorite or the most embarrassing photo of your partner as their Caller ID photo.

Play Hide and Seek. My wife and I have had some fun with this one. In each apartment we have lived in, we have “christened” it with a couple good games of hide and seek. If you want to put an adult spin on this game, play it naked and whenever you get found you have to complete some sort of sensual act with each other in the location of your hiding place.

I'll be trying these and will let you know how it goes. Got any ideas of your own to add?

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